Many times, when someone offends us, our natural reaction is to focus on the person. But the Lord reminds us to look deeper. In a recent conversation with Him, I was reminded that it is not always about the individual, but often about the spirit influencing them.
Jesus demonstrated this when He said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan” (Matthew 16:23). He wasn’t condemning Peter as a person; He was addressing the spirit that was trying to derail God’s plan through Peter’s words.
This shows us two important things:
1. We need constant communion with God
Just as Jesus healed differently in different situations—sometimes with a word, sometimes with touch, sometimes with mud on the eyes—God gives wisdom for each unique circumstance in our lives. One principle won’t fit every situation.
Science even backs this up: our brains are wired to look for patterns and shortcuts (called heuristics), which is why we tend to apply one solution everywhere. But the Spirit of God teaches us flexibility and discernment, guiding us moment by moment. That’s why ongoing communion with God is vital; without His direction, we risk reacting out of habit or emotion instead of wisdom.
2. We must separate the person from the spirit
Evil spirits often take advantage of wounds in our hearts. For example, if I’ve been rejected, I might overperform to gain acceptance or push people away to protect myself. Psychology calls this projection or repetition compulsion—we repeat unhealthy patterns because of unresolved wounds. Spiritually, these wounds become open doors where the enemy can whisper lies or stir up harmful behavior.
But when we ask God for discernment, He helps us see the real source. Paul wrote, “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against rulers, authorities, and powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 6:12).
When we recognize this, it becomes easier not to take offence. We can guard our hearts (Proverbs 4:23), respond with sober judgment, and choose love instead of retaliation.
Prayer
Heavenly Father,
Thank You for reminding me that my battle is not against people, but against the enemy’s schemes. Teach me to see with spiritual eyes and not just human eyes. Help me discern the spirit behind situations, so that I may respond in wisdom and love. Heal every wound in my heart that the enemy tries to use against me. Fill me with Your Spirit so I can walk in grace, speak truth in love, and guard my heart from offence. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Reflection Questions
- Can I think of a recent time when I reacted to a person instead of pausing to ask God what was really happening?
- What wounds from my past might the enemy try to use to influence my reactions (rejection, fear, insecurity, anger)?
- How can I invite God into those areas for healing so I respond with love instead of offence?
- What spiritual practices (prayer, journaling, scripture meditation) can I strengthen to stay in constant communion with God?
- This week, when someone offends me, how can I pause and ask, “Lord, show me what’s really behind this” before I respond?
✨ Takeaway: Offence loses its power when we learn to separate the person from the spirit and let God guide our response.